My Shield

Dear my little pill,

Thank you for becoming my shield against my endometriosis. You have fixed many things and I am grateful to have my life back again. Sometimes I take you for granted and it can get annoying taking a pill every day at the same time and the occasional mood drop can become tiresome. But then I have a break and the pain, nausea, fatigue and pain (again) reminds me that I have a remedy for most of the days of the year and the fact that (for me at least) it is just a little pill is actually very cool. You have even decreased my symptoms of PTSD which is an added bit of fabulous.

Thank you v much,

Anonymous

Toxic Relationship

Dear Combined Pill,

It's been a couple of months. I'm not sure who's to blame for our breakup - I guess it wasn't your fault that you made my body form blood clots in my lungs, but I'm finally realising it wasn't my fault either. I just wish someone had been able tell me we were in a toxic relationship before I had to be hospitalised.

Regards, Melissa

Melissa, UK

Diagnosis Party!

Dear period,

Here we are. About 9 years after my first period. It has been a wild ride so far. Over the past years we have dealt with so many irregular periods, horrible cramps, pregnancy scares and so much more. I have always felt that there was something a bit off about you. I never knew what and I was never encouraged to figure it out. Never. I was actually advised against figuring out what was actually wrong. I felt helpless, scared, frustrated and so much more. Until I was done with all of that and decided that I needed to know what was wrong. We have dealt with 3 types of different birth control pills, broken condoms, an implant, coitus interruptus, fertility awareness methods to finally come to the hormonal coil. Because the other methods weren't especially helpful with regulating you and giving me the security I needed to feel safe, I came down to the decision to get a hormonal coil. Not using any other birth control except condoms was not an option because my partner didn't feel safe enough. So I came down to a coil. But not after I went to multiple doctors to insist a examination about PCOS. I had read so much about this hormonal disorder that I was certain that this was it. And it was. Finally after all those years of not knowing what was happening, I finally do. And it brings me so much joy that I don't have to question my period every time it happens.

Love Sophie

Sophie, Netherlands

Dysphoria, Go Fuck Yourself

Dear my distressingly intense Dysphoria

First of all I’d like to kindly ask you to go fuck your self. Second of all why would you do this to me. I’ve been nothing but decent to my body (I say decent cause I haven’t done my best to take care of my body). I kept you out of harms way, you’ve never broken a bone, and I haven’t been sick enough to need to go to the hospital. In return it feels like my body’s decided to betray me in one of the shittiest ways possible. it’s hard because Gender Dysphoria is seen as a mental health issue not a bodily disease, so I can’t just take some medicine and become cured. I don’t know whether to hate my body for being wrong or my brain for not being able to see my body as “correct”. I’ve binded my chest and cried over my period for too long for me to handle anymore. The social Dysphoria is mind numbingly annoying since no one assumes someone is non-binary and I express myself “too feminine” for people to assume I’m a boy. And if I hear one more “my gender is an attack helicopter” joke I’m gonna steal someone’s kidneys.

With annoyance, anger, and other a-words, a non-binary malevolent slime.

Miles, USA

Beats Being Pregnant

Dear Injection,

Thanks for making me gain 15 pounds in a year. I feel awful about my body. Thanks for the awful side effects. Thanks for the spotting and discharge 24/7. But I guess all that beats being pregnant :).

Anonymous, USA

Like Clockwork

Dear Pill,

Thank you for halving the amount of pads I have to use each period and for taking the stress of not knowing when my period will show up!

Thank you for minimising the back pain and cramps I used to get but had to ignore!

Thank you for making life just a little bit easier to deal with by taking the period stress away making it all work like clockwork!

Sincerely, Me

Kate, UK

Sinking Heart

Dear pad and tampon companies,

Do you realise my heart sinks when you put female signs on your packaging? Do you know you're hurting nonbinary people? Would it be so hard to... not?

Alex, UK

Pre-Pill

Dear Pill,

I am glad to say that I’ve just celebrated a year without you in my life after two and a half difficult years with you in it. Despite protecting me from pregnancy, you caused many changes to my mind and to my body that really hurt me. You caused me to retain water, go through worse periods than pre-pill life, and lead to me spiralling into depression. I was not happy in myself at all. Things have changed a lot and I feel like my pre-pill self again (finally!).
You really won’t be missed, condoms are much better for me now!

Georgia, UK

Left a Scar

Dear Implant,

I read so many reviews and talked to friends before finally deciding on you. You were a bit painful to begin with. We had 9 lovely carefree months together. I didn't have to worry about a thing but I was worried about everything and anything. I became depressed and anxious, maybe not entirely your fault. However, I decided we should part ways and it was a nice clean break-up. You've left me a scar but I am happier now, hormone free and surprisingly worry free.

Switching to condoms was easier than I thought with my partner supporting me 100%. I feel lucky to have them and now to be hormone free.

Love
Lucy

Lucy, Scotland

Focusing on the Important Stuff

Dear IUD,

After having my son, I needed to find a birth control that wouldn’t mess with my milk supply. I got the IUD and not only did it not effect my milk but I don’t have to worry about periods or getting pregnant. It really freed my mind so I could focus on being a mom and being present with my son.

Jess, Canada

A Tale of Three Relationships

Dear Pills, Implant and Needle,

You were my life line in the fight against not getting pregnant for 10 years, I started with the pill at 16 years old and you were great, you made sure that my period was always on time and that I wasn't in a ton of pain all the time, and we were great until life got busy in college and I kept forgetting to take you, and it was scary, so I did research, and found the implant. You were a little match stick that sat in my arm, you weren't uncomfortable, and I could feel you under my skin, which was fine. But after a 5 week long period.... We needed to break up.

Along came the needle, you were ideal, 12 weeks between shots, no period, only a short pain after getting done, it sounded perfect. well, we broke up in March after a year because I wanted to know what I was like off artificial hormones, and well… still no period? Where'd she go?

Sincerely,
Just looking for my Period.

Anonymous, Ireland

Not Dirty

Dear period,

Thanks for forcing me to get comfortable with my vagina. thanks for making me spend countless hours digging for my menstrual cup the first time I used one, getting covered in blood and not feeling disgusted, because it wasn’t dirty. It was natural. Thanks for helping me understand my health, by disappearing when I had disordered eating, reminding me that skinny doesn’t equal healthy. Thanks for being predictable. Thanks for being 3 days long. Thanks for making me feel in tune with my own experience of womanhood, but allowing me to realise that being a woman is not confined to having a vagina that bleeds, or breasts that ache for half the month. and I mean ACHE, that is something I don’t thank you for, period.

Yours faithfully, your owner

Anonymous, UK

Back and Forth

Dear natural hormones,

I have had such a massive journey with you even if it's only been three years. From 16 I used artificial hormones because I hated how irregular and spotty you made me and not having a clue what to do about it except take a pill. Three years later, after going back and forth with overwhelming types of contraception thrown at me, I have invited you back into my life. Not only do I know a hell of a lot more on how to manage you, but I'm also able to embrace you and nurture you for when I need you in 20/30 years.

From your body

Anonymous, UK

Discharge Tells All…

Dear Contraception,

Since getting to know my body, educating myself and being able to identify where I am in my cycle purely from what type of discharge I produce, I have now gotten rid of you forever. Goodbye artificial hormones and latex sperm shields, hello freedom!

Good riddance,

Phoebe

Phoebe, England

Managing PCOS

Dear (possible) PCOS,

You suck!
The weight gain and the inability to lose weight sucks. The excess hair that has made me self conscious since I was young sucks. The intense period pain sucks.

Luckily, finding a diet that works in lockdown by reducing the sugar I eat and exercise has meant that I've managed to lose a stone so far and I'm no longer classed as obese! Now to finding a method of coping with the rest!

Thank you to my hormonal coil for helping with this so far. Gone from having around a 60 day cycle on the implant to a 30 day one on the coil! Big up the coil!!

Here's to the future and managing the rest!

Cait

Caitlin, UK

Rough Start

Dear Implant,

We had a rough start in our relationship. The first year of having you was rocky, periods every two weeks or two months. But 3 and a half years later, we’re on our second implant and life has never been better. Thank you for taking away the periods and the pain that came with them. If you could be so kind as to get rid of the PMS and spots that come with it though, that would be great!

Anonymous, UK

Could You Not?

 Dear Period Cramps,

Could you not? I would like to get out of bed at some point today.

Thanks,
-Chris

Chris, USA

Funny Story

Dear IUD,

The 10 seconds of pain putting you in is well worth the lighter periods and sex (especially the sex). My anxiety is lessened about unplanned pregnancy thanks to you. Plus, you gave me that funny story about the med student who was so excited when I told her she could look at my vagina too instead of just politely standing by the door unable to see anything.

Chris, USA

A ‘Normal’ Sex Life

Dear Vaginismus,

You have ruined my chances of having a 'normal' sex life. Not just physical but the mental exhaustion and questioning whether my partner still wants to be with me when he is such a sexual person and I am not and cannot. Even three years after physiotherapy and sexual health counseling, I am still struggling daily and really do not want this to tear my relationship apart when everything else is great. You have crushed my self-esteem and self-worth. Why me?

Please leave me alone.

Anonymous, UK

Cracking Pair of Tits

Dear pill,

I am so sorry it took me so long to meet you, but thank you. I know you made me put on some weight which initially made me self conscious but I have a cracking pair of tits now thanks to you, and the little tummy I have now is so much better than periods that lasted more than a week and caused me so much pain and discomfort. Please keep working xxx

Kate, UK